Taking Internal Family Systems Outdoors
By Stephen Toriello, ACSW and Clinician at the IFS Telehealth Collective
Interdependence
When there is harmony among all parts of oneself, we feel whole. It is akin to a flock of birds moving together like one organism. We also become more flexible, resilient, and grounded, like a tree rooted in the Earth. We are in touch with the element of the sky, allowing more space inside. I love to use nature metaphors to demonstrate how IFS therapy can help us find balance among all members of our internal “family,” because human beings are mirrors of the natural world, we are microcosms of the greater whole.
The word “systems” in Internal Family Systems refers to the interdependent “webs” of life, the relationships that connect all beings and things. An individual person has layers and elements that interact, just like any living system. Each person is linked to communities and ecosystems beyond the boundaries of their skin. We rely on the Earth for our health and well-being, and the Earth relies on us. Research has demonstrated the significant positive mental and physical health effects of connecting with nature. Indigenous peoples – whose traditional wisdom includes a deep understanding of interdependence – have demonstrated for millenia how we can live in a symbiotic relationship with the land. But somewhere along the way, many of us have developed a colonial mindset, which includes the false notion that we are separate from the rest of nature and therefore we can dominate and control other living beings, extracting and polluting natural resources without consequence. As a result, we have had such a negative impact on the planet that it is appropriate to say we are now in an ecological crisis.
This is not so different from the internal crises that bring people to reach out to the therapists at IFS-TC. Because of our relational wounding, many of us have learned to exile, oppress, dominate, and control parts of ourselves, just as we do in society, and just as we do to the Earth. The principles of IFS therapy are therefore applicable internally as well as on a broader scale. Ultimately, the goal of IFS therapy is to support the release of these burdens of domination that keep us from returning to balance, harmony, and wholeness. In this process, we re-connect to our innate well-being, re-integrate and rebuild harmonious relationships within ourselves, in society, and with the planet at large.
Reconnecting with Nature
We are publishing this blog during springtime in North America. Warmer temperatures are drawing many of us outdoors to enjoy the birds and blooming flowers, perhaps to go for a hike or to plant a garden. We are drawn to connect with nature because we intuitively know that it is good for us. This is backed up by science that shows myriad benefits including stress reduction, improved sleep, decreased depression and anxiety, improved cognitive functioning, improved immune functioning, faster postoperative recovery, reduced risk of cardiovascular disease, and more. Fascinating research on the human microbiome and its link to mental and physical health has shown that our bodies can be inoculated with diverse beneficial gut microorganisms through contact with the natural world, particularly soil. The line between the seemingly separate, autonomous human being and the outside world begins to blur when we consider the flow of these tiny, yet powerful living beings in and out of our porous bodies. A teaspoon of soil is a universe unto itself, containing more microorganisms than the number of human beings on the planet, and a human being may be better thought of as a “superorganism” given how reliant we are upon these myriad “other” living beings that we host in our guts.
Gaia (Self)
Whether examining the microscopic layers of the universe or the vastness of the cosmos, it is easy to feel a range of positive emotions when witnessing the miracle of nature. You probably know firsthand the awe of taking in the unfathomable night sky. You may have also experienced the peacefulness of gazing out on a serene lake, your mind naturally settling and becoming as still as the water itself. Or you may have felt the sense of safety and love that can arise while relishing the warmth of the early morning sun. In IFS therapy, we understand the peace, connectedness, compassion and harmony that we can easily feel when we are in natural settings, as qualities of human nature – the true Self. The Self can be found beneath the well-meaning protective parts of us that put up a hard shell and block the flow of connection between and within. Self is present when we release the burdens of disconnection.
Many who find a deep sense of connectedness begin to feel that their true Self is really much bigger than what they once thought. Many spiritual traditions acknowledge an expansive ultimate reality that underlies our everyday lives – known by many names, including God, Buddha, or Brahma. But you don’t need to be a mystic to realize that everything on planet Earth is interdependent. Some scientists and philosophers have conceptualized the Earth as a single superorganism – referred to as Gaia. Like the many living beings that compose an individual person – or the many parts of the mind that we explore in IFS therapy – the Earth itself can similarly be seen as a one big organism composed of many parts. From this perspective, poisoning the oceans is poisoning ourselves. There is no throwing trash “away” – the landfill is my own body. We can only turn around and harm other living beings and the planet by first creating a false sense of disconnection, cutting ourselves off from the rest of the Earth. On the other hand, relating to everything as an extension of oneself has the potential to ease much of the suffering in our world.
Our Mother
When Mother Earth is well, humans are well. When she is suffering, we also suffer. Our physical health and safety is clearly threatened when we breathe polluted air, consume microplastics in our water, and experience devastating natural disasters. Our mental health suffers when we experience the increasing loneliness, separation, and isolation that our modern world encourages. And mental health researchers and practitioners are recognizing an increasing amount of mental distress in our society as a result of our growing awareness of the ecological crisis. This has been variously described as eco-anxiety, eco-grief, and eco-guilt, among other terms.
There is no single “correct” way to cope with these stressors. We may all have different responses, but I’d like to suggest that any solution to these problems must involve reconnecting to nature, to our Self, to the inner and outer families of life. You might start by connecting with what is alive in you, allowing your Self to be with your feelings, validating them, and offering them loving attention. The point of IFS therapy isn’t to get rid of difficult feelings. In the natural world, every element and living being has a role to play – there are no “bad” parts. Just as biodiversity is essential in the external world, it is healthy to feel the full range of diverse human emotions in our internal world. Mental blockages dam up these feelings, leading to emotional flooding when they burst through. Nature is wise, and we are wise to work with it, rather than against it. Although it can be seemingly chaotic and wild, there is always a greater purpose that is served. Finding the courage to turn towards the wilderness of difficult emotions that are alive in you can be an important first step.
When our Mother Earth is ill, grief is the most natural feeling in the world. When we connect with this grief, we are connecting with our love for life, and this love is an infinitely renewable resource. It can power us to be the change we wish to see in the world. This energy can manifest in a variety of beneficial actions. You might get involved in activism, perhaps supporting indigenous groups or environmental organizations, or maybe you want to adopt a street tree outside your apartment or join a community garden. Because we are interdependent, our small personal actions have ripple effects in the broader community. But remember, you don’t need to do this alone. If you believe you could use some support with your processing of eco-anxiety or eco-grief, you may want to reach out to an IFS therapist. Otherwise, get in touch with a community of fellow nature lovers, advocates, family or friends. We are never really alone, but being together helps us remember that.
Would you like to learn to reconnect with your Self and the world around you? A therapist at IFS Telehealth Collective can help you find and connect with the parts that need to be seen, heard, and ultimately healed by you. If you live in California, Florida, Massachusetts, Michigan, New York, or Oregon, please contact our Client Care Coordinator or call 503-447-3244.
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